043

In despair  

I find my self at odds with myself, looking around I see a world full of potential wasted away by money. I can see a life without it, I ponder an existence without money. The problem, occurs that that it seemingly appears collectivist, crushing the individual yet in my minds eye I see it need not be that way. Stuck I am in language unable to express that a global order could exist without collective ideology.

A world could prosper in pluralism and still have no money, the comes reaction is well it would be barter, I say nay. I still believe it need not be this way I still believe we could do it. In common understating we are better off without it. Not a world without possession but a world full of property could still exist without the money complex.

We could move from bit reciprocity to a system of full reciprocity, were debit is but a simple thing that we work to keeping the world moving, work to take from the system we built and for successive generations, to keep the old and young in the best possible care with access to all the fruits of the human endeavor.   We would work for the betterment of all humankind without the adage that collectivist ideology tearing down the individual’s liberty.

Think of the suffering that could be bypassed, think of all the children as life is not equal, lo in such a world as money brings, that opportunity is not equal and that is all we truly want is an equal chance to live to have equal access to health care, nutrition and education to thrive with the that best the world can bring. For now with bits a two tear system it is, where over half cannot enjoy the fruits of the human endeavor, where over half despite hard graft, dedication and compliance to the law cannot afford the basic needs that make life worth the effort.

Some you see despite the graft are stuck in poverty all because we have these bits as a form of reciprocity. You see dear reader money is and always will be as life itself is, disparic, so why do we add to it the misery as life itself is disparic enough without the monetary complex.

Imagine all those complex minds working in money, what a waste of global potential. All those minds could turn to more uplifting work, rather than tracking wealth and debits. All that brain power simply wasted on fiddling with imaged values.

There are problems though things I can not map such as how property would work and change hand, for you see I see that personal property is a basic human need. A need to have something of ones own to have a stake in this world and gain pride in. it is this stake in ownership that makes the landscape preened. For no man takes batter care than of that witch is his own. Better minds would need to take up the course and work out a system. Yet these better minds are stuck from birth in this indoctrinated cash system.

No hope I fear for a better world, hope I fear has gone because the minds that see it could be so are stuck in collectivist minds. I diaper at this world I’m forced to live in, often I wish I wasn’t even here, despite the claims iv work rather hard, in a system I don’t fully understand with life stacked against me. I tried to get by with that horrible stuff that I simply do not like. Since I was I child I could add two and two yet I cold never see the need to this day why we must have money.

There is problems I know that I cannot solve that doesn’t make them unsolvable, if only as one world we could pout to one side this idea that more money means more wealth, the more there is the less value it holds the less people have in effect. contently working harder and harder for less and less as money grows oh the dipsare. What a mess it would be to have a single currency, yet that’s were the conversation goes. Think of how fast we could move with our economic minds set to a new task of making a world without money work.

Yet of things like resources, I cannot fathom the courses, yet in my heart of hearts I know, I world without money could be. I am in conflict with my mind and my heart. I’m conflicted by needing to live, not wanting to live and haunted by my past of deeds done to me and deeds I have done. I carry my prison wherever I go and still I must get by. I hate this world I live it so because I see the potential in the eyes of all of us that we can do and be better than we are. It may be hard to map a new world that doesn’t make in an impossible task. If only the brighter than me would work as hard at it. I’m at my limits and struggling to express the conflict I have in my heart.  

I will sit and ill pray that the world sees some day that we can do it without money, though as I feared as a child never shall it be in my lifetime. I know life itself is disparic enough as the table have always been stacked against me, what happened to me as child was wrong things I cannot bring myself to write, set me on a path of two worlds two personalities. I been through so much and iv shamed myself. only brought low by God and raised back up, a tail I will tell you one day. Some days I wish I just wasn’t here with hope fading each day as the world witch we live growers more tyrannical and less free with each pressing day. Here I am unable to help because of my lot, my past I would not survive the public eye.

Each day thou I grow a little better than I was the day before, that is something at least.

Published by Engine Mortale

Engine Mortale is my chosen pseudonym, I’ve chosen a pseudonym because I think it most appropriate as some of work will be rather personal. I figured this was the best way. I’m an autodidact, my to prominent fields of study’s are behaviour and philosophy, most recently art and poetry have been of keen interest. I hope genuinely that some good comes out of my out of this thing i call a life, if nothing else just that.

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